Monday, March 12, 2012

Stranger's to................ Friend's

Early morning walks have become the way of life for many these days!!!  , I am one among them. (Trying to be health freak I guess). Actually I try to be away from the hustle- bustle and escape from the temporary worries of life for some time.

As it is a regular practice, you tend to meet a lot of people who are as regular as you are (few whom you know by name, few by faces) so a nod here and there, a smile here and there and followed by good mornings is a ritual we follow.

From among them, I noticed a new face a few days ago… whenever we crossed there was that eye contact (it seemed as if we both were trying to tell each other something). Days passed we started exchanging smiles. Every day she would make an eye contact and give a pleasant smile, I could sense that she was looking for a conversation; a bit reluctant to be the initiator (sometimes body language says it all). She was trying to adjust to the new place, surroundings and people, which was my preliminary understanding. 

We all have felt that sometime or the other whenever we have moved places…..and we also know that we have hundreds of questions in our mind... unfortunately with no answers…!!!

I decided a night before, that I would take the initiative to introduce myself get the conversational ball rolling.   On approaching her and with those, formal hellos and exchange of speck of personal details... I could tell that she was seriously looking for someone to talk to ( but was a bit shy and scared to talk to stranger ) and I felt great that I was able to be of help and answers to lots of her questions.

The thoughts that stayed with me through the day were.......

Walking up to a stranger and striking up a conversation is social equivalent of sky diving its fun, interesting and risky. But there are people for whom ( I was also among such a few years ago ) it’s not easy to  start a conversation with new people,  like Vandana ( the name of my new friend ), the thought of trying to make a conversation with people who are new makes them break into cold sweat !!

We as children are taught that “Never talk to Strangers” we seem to follow that even when we are adults.

People who find it difficult to go and start a conversation , I think it’s just because they are putting too much pressure on themselves, they think they have to put up a great performance to impress the other person .. Is it really so???

They just have to let themselves be what they are, just be ordinary and talk about ordinary things .when you think that you have to be at your best and perfect in your conversation, you ruin it all. You are more focused on what you have to say and less focused on the person you have just met.

The person or the people you have just met are not looking for brilliant conversation. What they are looking is someone who they will be comfortable with, fun to talk, and most important interested in them….Listening to them.

After all, majority of the conversation between two new people don’t go anywhere, so what if the encounter does not turn into the great friendship. It takes time, effort and mutual interests to turn casual strangers to friends.

Remember, that all of the friends we already have were strangers to us at one point in our life, until we started talking and found out what we have in common.

Learning how to make conversation with people you don’t know well can be the first step in making many new friends, that’s how I have added one more in my friend list ……


A day in the life of a MOM said...

Excellently written Shazneen..

Free Bird said...

Very well said ... Striking conversation with a stranger is equivalent of social sky diving :-) , can be fun sometime & also disastrous ...